Boy Next Door

OK. Lemme share a small inside detail with you - my MOM, who's a doctor and doesn't cry when her PATIENTS die, was sobbing here... So you can pretty much imagine what I'm looking like right about now. Something tells me David E Kelley has been sneaking a peek at our allyfic mailing list and JUST SO HAPPENED to stumble across Pale's writing - she's the murderer of the group. She always kills everyone off in her fics, and for some reason the best go first... And THANK YOU, dear David, for ruining my week entirely - I just started a fic I thought was going great, and it revolved around LOVE. Nelle & John, Georgia and the demised (I'm writing about 3 years into the future) Billy and Ally bumping into Greg... GREAT. So now, Nelle's a bitch and they're broken up, which makes ONE part incredibly hard to write. Who's next? Georgia & Billy... Well, he never loved her and she didn't seem to be grieving THAT much, so down the drain with another part... And Ally's still in love with friggin' Billy - GREAT!!!!!!! WONDERFUL!!!!!!!! Now, all that has to happen from here is Masha/Lyosha have to lose at Worlds on Wednesday, and then I'll be completely and totally the poster child for suicide... PERFECT. THANK YOU, David dearest... *dripping with tears & sarcasm*

NOW do you see why I love Chris Carter??? Sure, he killed Emily, but now I see she'd just ruin the show if she stayed... He SAVED everyone else! UGH. I'm like soooooo... everything right now:(.

Okay, lets start the normal part... well, actually, there will be no normal part, it'll just be mixture of everything altogether since that's what my brain is like today... (after sitting in front of the computer for 3 1/2 hours watching pictures change, you *can* go a little mad... bear with me, I'm ONLY human. AND fanatical about figure skating... among other things... moving on...)

I never, EVER expected it to be so soon. WHY???? WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY??????????????? OK, so it's probably not David's fault... after all, Gil himself wanted to leave. So there, I've said my apologies to David. Sorta...

"A brain tumor?... In your head?"
"No, it's in my ass, Ally... I have a brain tumor in my ass..." - probably the happiest quote of the episode. Ties with "Will you tell him how much I hate him?" for best quote of the episode.

The death scene was medically wrong, as my sobbing mother later pointed out, but oh well. Lets forget about that for a second...

It wasn't really his death that had me sobbing. It wasn't totally his confession to Ally either. What had me sobbing were the flashbacks... [to Vonda's "Neighbourhood", OF COURSE, SO WE COULD SOB MORE!!!!! DO YOU DRAW SOME KIND OF PLEASURE FROM THIS, DAVID?????????????????] (sorry 'bout that...) Why? It made me realize how great he was in the first season. How great he was in the second season. How, despite the things I was yelling at him in "Pyramids On The Nile" (ie when he & Ally kissed in Season 2) - I was a strong believer in monogamy back then, now I see I was stupid and should've been for Ally & Billy from the very beginning - as I said, I should've been on Ally's side... I suddenly have this HATE, pure HATE for Georgia. Maybe it's best she's leaving...

The flashbacks also made me realize that "Ally" isn't "Ally" anymore... it's something else. I love it nonetheless, but it's not the "Ally" I loved in the previous seasons... Season 1 was so great. So was Season 2. And I liked Georgia... stupid, stupid me. I should've been for Ally all along, and I've realized it when it's too late...

But maybe, just maybe, that was for the best. What helped me realize that I really SHOULD'VE been for Ally & Billy getting back together. Calista's performance today. Simply breathtaking... And, tragic as it is, I really do realize that there was no other way for him to tell Ally he loved her... he had to die. She couldn't have been with him in the real world, though she always was... in a way.

It was really, really, REALLY sweet of Ally to tell Georgia that his last words were "Tell Georgia I love her..." Though Georgia just seemed empty today, like she had no soul. Oh WOW, she shed a few tears. BIG deal - NOT. Ally was really the only one who lost something BIG enough to cry over, and she cried enough to satisfy the circumstances. Georgia didn't. She never really loved him... that's what I'm starting to figure out. Did he love her? Doubt it...

I loved the Billy of Season 1. And 2. And probably, somewhere deep inside, I loved the Billy of 3 because of what he HAD been in seasons 1 & 2.

Two things WERE missing, though:
1. Nelle should've absolutely, positively and totally - no question about it - gone to John in the end. It's obvious she's just mad. They're not over. She should've realized how horrible it is to lose someone you love... and they love each other, no doubt... (I'm probably just saying this to give myself confidence in ending my fic the proper the way. I'm almost on the verge of killing off Nelle [I've been reading too much of Pale's work, haven't I?] and having John get together with Ally...) With THAT added, the episode would've been perfect.

2. There was line I was SURE Ally would add, but didn't... when she told Georgia "He loved cliche`", she should've added "After all, he married YOU..." I understand that would've been CRUEL, and Ally's by no means a cruel person, but I'm just saying... the line would've been perfect, IMO.

Oh, and also - what the hell is a "fun funeral"?????

What a great way to start a week!!! I can TELL it'll be fantastic!

Masha's in second after the Short Program, Billy's dead, Ally's bawling, I'm bawling, my fic is doomed and, um, what else...? Oh yes, my printer's out of ink. JUST WHEN I GET THE "Hollywood AD" script... GREAT!!!!!!!!

~pissed, sad and nervous ally~