What We've Learned From The X-Files


~ [courtesy of fallenangel_717]

Iced tea is always a better choice.

Shooting your partner is a sign of love.

Falling asleep and drooling on your partner is cute.

A lie is most convincingly hidden between two truths.

The truth is out there but so are lies.

All lies lead to the truth.

As a general rule, scruffy minds don't commit murder.

People don't lie, they just wilfully participate in a campaign of misinformation.

Smart is sexy.

Standing in a cemetery in the middle of the night is considered a date.

Wearing your partner's necklace is a sign of love.

A hand on the back means "I love you"

A kiss on the cheek is better than a kiss on the lips.

Always tell your partner who you are on the phone, even though they know your voice better than their own.

An insult in the right hands becomes a come on.

Playing with your partner's necklace is adorable.

Life is like a box of chocolate, a cheap, thoughtless, perfunctory gift that no one ever asked for.

When in doubt, a keychain or sports video is a great way to express your love.

Nothing says love like a rescue from a serial killer or another assorted type of monster.

Innuendo is most effective when returned.

Time is a universal invariant.

Calling someone by their last name is a term of endearment.

When talking to your partner, always substitute the word love with trust. It means the same thing.

Singing to your partner (even when it's off key) is adorable and should be encouraged.

Sometimes we look too hard for what isn't there.

Refusing to let your partner go after the current mutant, instead delegating her "the next mutant" is chivalrous and sweet.

Always listen to the psychic sister.

Apology is policy.

Not everything dies.

Giving your gun to your partner is a sign of trust.

When in doubt, ask your partner to examine your mosquito bites.

Barbecue sauce on the chin is cute.

Trust no one (Except your partner).

Older brothers can be judgmental and idiotic, especially to one's soul mate.

One today is worth two tomorrows.

The house always wins.

What can be imagined can be achieved.

You must dare to dream, but nothing takes the place of perseverance and hard work.

No one gets there alone.

There are hits and there are misses, and then there are misses.

Jeremiah was a bullfrog.

"exsanguination" can be worked into everyday conversation.

No one in their right mind names their child "Bambi".

When in doubt, trade your long lost sister for your partner.(it's worth it)

The state of Oregon is "very plausible"

To live the lie you have to believe it.

We're constantly in fear of that which cannot be programmed, catergorized or easily referenced.

Bees are the worst insects on earth (Die Bee Die).

If you have no plans for a Friday evening, you can always"Pick out something black and sexy and prepare to do some funky poaching)

One man alone cannot fight the future, but throw in a lady and everything is dandy.

The best line in Moby Dick is "Hell is an idea first born on an undigested apple dumpling."

G-Woman is a term of endearment.

A trenchcoat goes with everything.

Dreams are the answers to questions we have not learned how to ask.

Changing your hair every year will keep your co-workers talking and earn you the nickname weedwhacker.

If you've heard the truth, demand the answers.

The conquest of fear lies in the moment of its acceptance.

There can always be another explanation.

Nothing happens in contradiction to nature; just what we know of it.

The laws of Physics don't always apply.

We all have a natural instinct to propagate.

Don't unlock doors you're not ready to go through.

Long life is a mixed blessing.

Some secrets should remain secret.

Never seek the truth if you're not ready to accept it.

Someone's ideas are always weirder than yours.

Never take siblings for granted.

False history is written in the blood of those who might remember, and those who seek the truth.

Some one is always paying attention.

I am you and you are me, and we are all together.

Smoking is a very bad habit.

Sometimes, you just know.

Big Brother is watching.

Death only looks for you once you seek its opposite.

Beware the Man in Black.

The words "Oh Brother" directly translate to: "I Love you too!"

Coke should never taste too sweet. If it does, look for green powder nearby.

Stay away from bathrooms.

Carry an extra gun at all times.

All the nuts roll down to Florida.

You can't ask the truth of a man who deals in lies.

Keep your arms straight when firing a gun.